Are you a young man who is a follower of Jesus but still struggles with sexual issues and feel trapped with porn and masturbation?
We know this causes a lot of shame and feeling spiritually defeated. Many have tried to stop so many times but feel powerless to do so.
We offer practical discipleship tools for small groups that actually help. Discipleship and real change happens in honest small groups. We provide you with tools to teach you how to fight spiritually so you can freely follow Jesus.
Beginning the process of living lust free in Christ results in spiritually and sexually healthy men, fathers, marriages and families. The book "Dangerous Men" is your guide.
WHAT YOUNG MEN SAY
“I came to know Christ at a young age. Now, 15 years later, I’m only beginning to realize the true blessing of having parents who follow Christ. But growing up in a Christian home comes with its own set of issues and struggles. The issues of lust and masturbation were hardly ever… [read more]
Tim says:
“I came to know Christ at a young age. Now, 15 years later, I’m only beginning to realize the true blessing of having parents who follow Christ. But growing up in a Christian home comes with its own set of issues and struggles. The issues of lust and masturbation were hardly ever discussed in my home or church. In fact, I can’t remember either of my parents even saying the “M” word. But whether I was willing to admit it or not, these issues were very real in my life, and ignoring them only added to the problem.
I masturbated for the first time in 7th or 8th grade. It wasn’t lustful. It wasn’t sinful. It was simply curiosity about “my changing body”. I don’t remember exactly when I began to masturbate lustfully, or the first time I looked at porn, but I can tell you that my ‘innocent’ masturbation didn’t last long at all. Before I knew it, I was addicted to masturbation. I was disgusted by what I did and the things I looked at online, but I just couldn’t seem to stop.
It wasn’t until my freshman year of college that I realized my attitude about dealing with lust was completely wrong. I thought that since I was supposed to be a “good Christian boy”, it was my job to clean myself up and stop masturbating. In theological terms, I knew that I was saved by grace, but for some reason, I saw sanctification as my own responsibility. One day, while reading out of Galatians, God blew that idea out of the water.
I don’t think I’ve ever heard God speak to me as clearly as he did through Galatians 3:3 that day. “Are you so foolish? After beginning with the Spirit, are you now trying to attain your goal by human effort?” God was literally screaming at me, “Did you think I would save you only to leave you alone to clean your life up??? Your sanctification is just as much my job as your salvation! You cannot do it alone!!” Hearing this was a weight off my shoulders. I finally realized there was nothing I could do to overcome lust; it was all about what Jesus had already done for me.
But things didn’t change overnight. It wasn’t until a year later, as part of a DANGEROUS MEN group that I learned to wage all-out war against lust. Through prayer, accountability, and a better understanding of the spiritual warfare that was going on around me, I finally began to gain ground in my battle against lust. I learned to renounce the lies the enemy told me, and replace them with the truth that I am God’s boy. Not because of anything I’ve done, but because of the work Jesus did on the cross.
My battle against lust isn’t over. I will be fighting it until the day I die. I still stumble. I still look at things I shouldn’t. But now, when I mess up, I confess it and get back to following Jesus. I have a long way to go, but with the help of my brothers in Christ, and through the power that only he can give, I am learning how to live lust free.”
“I saw my first pornographic video in 6th grade. It had the effect of instantly turning every woman I saw into an object to be used, a way for me to feel good. That filth gradually seeped into… [read more]
Andrew says:
“I saw my first pornographic video in 6th grade. It had the effect of instantly turning every woman I saw into an object to be used, a way for me to feel good. That filth gradually seeped into my mind and my heart and took hold. In junior high I would masturbate to lustful fantasies, until I learned I could steal pornographic magazines from the local gas station and masturbate to them.
The quagmire just deepened in high school. On top of magazines and videos I added sex with my girlfriend. I knew at the time that it was wrong, but my appetite for lust had grown way too big for me to stop, let alone control, what I was doing. I can think of several times I promised myself (and God) that I would clean up my act, to no avail. During this time Satan used my lust as a beachhead to launch attacks in my life: to sex was added open rebellion in the form of binge drinking, stealing, lying, and disrespect to my parents.
When I went to college I decided it was time for me to really clean myself up, and that went over about like a fart in Sunday school. Luckily, through the fellowship of new friends and a lot of overtime by the Holy Spirit I laid down my arms, so to speak, and accepted Christ as my Savior and Lord. However, I didn’t yet know him as my identity.
It’s different now. I went through DANGEROUS MEN with those same friends. I’ve had the privilege of being mentored by a man whose power in and dedication to Christ make the temptations of mediocrity pale in comparison. I’ve learned that Satan speaks lies and accusations, that he tempts me with lust because he wants me to be his slave. I’ve learned to fight spiritually, to take thoughts captive, to confess my sins to and pray for my accountability partner in a healing way. But most of all, I’ve been freed to feel the inseparable love of God, the irrepressible passion of Christ, and comforting presence of the Holy Spirit.”
“Leading a DANGEROUS MEN group with our roommates was a fantastic way to help us grow closer together as brothers in Christ. As we went through the lessons, I think the biggest thing that I took from it… [read more]
Tyler says:
“Leading a DANGEROUS MEN group with our roommates was a fantastic way to help us grow closer together as brothers in Christ. As we went through the lessons, I think the biggest thing that I took from it this time around was the recognition that in this fight, the point isn’t to not sin, but instead to pursue a relationship with our Savior. Through that pursuit and the relationship that follows, the sin and the junk just fade away like a dying side effect. The Steps to Freedom was huge for me this year too in that I faced a lot of bitterness in myself towards others and chose to give that over to God. That was really hard for me, and I’m so incredibly thankful that I burned my bitterness along with my sexual sins.”
